February 25, 1996 – Sunday – 9:00 p.m.

You will not believe how busy I have been.  So much has happened.

Thursday, Vince and Curtis and I went to Bible Study at Sharon’s.  It was really great.  But earlier that day our Bearclaw rehearsal lasted through dinner, so I didn’t eat anything.  Sharon baked brownies, so I ate a ton of those and drank lots of milk to wash down their goodness.  We stayed there until midnight and I got really sick to my stomach.  So sick that once I got in Curtis’ car and felt him back up, I almost puked.

So, Sharon forced me to spend the night there.  I slept in Hannah’s room.  She slept with Melissa.

I said my prayers and with the help of the Lord, Sharon laid me down to sleep.

I woke up after the greatest night’s sleep and Sharon drove me to school after taking Hannah to school.

We had the greatest talk.  I pray that my wife will be like her.  Driving through the mountain countryside and having her speak so much blessing over my life, it was simply a perfect morning.

Bearclaw opened today.  My mom, Henry, Nate, and Mandy came.  Mandy and I didn’t really talk much.  The show went really well.  Everybody was laughing and when it was over I got tons of compliments, even from strangers.

I have been the stage manager for Greater Tuna which closed tonight.  I’ve had a lot of fun doing that show.  I will miss it.

I got a call from Brandon and the wedding is being postponed, but I’m still going out to Arizona.

Twelve days.

The weather here has been really great.

It’s a nice evening.

I think I’ll go for a walk.


February 21, 1996 – Wednesday – 1:10 p.m.

I can write with my right hand now, but I still have the cast on.

In a week’s time, February will be over.  The show opens this weekend.

Today was the first spring-like day in many months.  Although I know March will still bring some snow, I’m looking forward to warm weather.

I talked to Lindy on the phone last night.  She called me.  I’m glad we are in this show together.

Katerina (my director) and I always flirt with each other.  I called her last night.  I have to meet her at 2:00 p.m. today.  We’re just going to talk about the show.

This warm weather makes me think of the summer.  It reminds me of Crestview.  I really do miss Emily.

But my collection must grow.

Spring Break is in 15 days.

February 17, 1996 – Saturday – 8:17 p.m.

In six months I will leave my teenage years.  I will have been alive for two decades.

There was a lot of snow on the ground today.  Dan had a ski race and he won as usual.

Lindy and I have a presentation due tomorrow in our Creative Process class.  So she came over today and we worked on it together.  I wish she would notice me more.  But we had a great talk and she’s a good friend.

I took my break from being on Duty at 4:00 p.m. and Curtis and Dan and I took a drive into parts of the country that we haven’t seen before.  All of it was white.  That simple drive made my day so wonderful.  I find an insane amount of peace just staring out a car window.  The hum of the road and the beauty outside.  Good friends right next to you.  Is there anything better?

I often feel alone when I stuck on duty and everyone is out, but I also guess I like it that way.  I like myself and I’m comfortable with myself.

I watched Forrest Gump this evening.  That movie teaches so much.

I wonder where my life will take me.

In 20 days it will take me to Arizona.  But after that, who knows.  I just want to do my best for the Lord.  I often forget about the simple joys.  I want to be free.

I can do my best in Bearclaw.  I can do my best in my school work.   I can do my best in loving people.

Thank you Lord for giving me everything I need to be the best I can be.

February 16, 1996 – Friday – 11:35 p.m.

So much to say, but hard to write.

There was a “great legs” contest here at school.  A member of the student government was allowed to nominate someone from each gender, they took a pictures of your legs and then put it on a jar and had all the jars on display in the cafeteria.  The way you voted for your favorite pair of legs was to put money in the jar.

Well, Lisa nominated me and it ended today.  I won for the guys.  So, I guess when I’m old I can tell my grandchildren that when I was a sophomore in college I was voted for having the greatest legs on campus.

I’m on duty again.  And everyone is gone.  I’m here looking after an empty dorm with literally no one to talk to; no one to share my amazing legs with.

Oh, the irony.

Bearclaw opens next weekend.

When will true love come?

February 14, 1996 – Wednesday – 4:30 p.m.

I didn’t wait until Thursday to go to the doctor.  My finger is broken.

My right hand is in a cast and I must write with my left.  Which is obvious, thanks to this nasty handwriting you are reading.

But, I’m still alive.

Mandy and I are writing each other.  That is good.  And the Oscar nominations are in.  Braveheart got 10.

I have to get Vince or Curtis to come to my room and button my pants and tie my shoes for me.

It’s Valentine’s Day, but I have no special friend.

This cast means I can’t ski for a while.

But I should get the cast off before Arizona.

Time is passing.

Nothing is lasting.


February 12, 1996 – Monday – 10:25 p.m.

Nate turned 11-years-old today.

A lot of things have occurred in my life recently.  To begin with, I played basketball with a few guys on my hall.  And in an effort to catch a ball, my finger was dislocated and it might even be broken.  I go to the doctor on Thursday.

Mike came up on Saturday and we went skiing at Sugar Mountain.  There were so many people there and it took forever to get through the lift line.  His parents were going to pick us up in the parking lot, or so we thought, but they said the Snack Bar.  Mike and I waited and waited, but they never came, so I called a guy from school and he came to pick us up.  His parents called my room five hours after they were supposed to pick us up.

They were pretty mad.

I was scared, but it’s over now.

Church was great on Sunday, but that night Murrell asked me to go skiing with her.  I did and I’m getting much better at it.

Today came and I gave my speech on Dr. Seuss in speech class.

Then, I checked my mail.  And I found out that my checkbook had bounced.  And I also have to go to court on March 1st for the Hawksnest incident.

It feels like I’m running out of time.

Bearclaw is getting difficult.

I need your help Lord to make all of this work.


February 8, 1996 – Thursday – 5:35 p.m.

This has been such a busy day, but it has been fun.  Performing Arts takes up a lot of my time, but I enjoy every second of it.  It is partly why God created me.  It is what keeps me going.

Sharon’s Bible study is tonight.  I’m not sure if I’ll be able to go though.  Curtis has gone to Atlanta and Dan can’t drive me there because he has a lot of homework.

Last night at church Molly and I had a nice short conversation.  Perhaps she is someone I can talk to.

Mike is coming up here Saturday; we’re going to go skiing.  I’m looking forward to seeing him.

I haven’t heard from my brother in a while.  I hope he’s fine.  Tenielle hasn’t written me back either.  I feel out of touch with home, but it looks like my summer is going to be spent here.  The summers here are really cool and not blistering hot like back home; that should be nice.

I ended my relationship with Jeni one year ago today.

Time is going so quickly and I cannot gain it back.

That’s okay, it get’s me one step closer to heaven.

February 6, 1996 – Tuesday – 1:15 p.m.

I had a big American Literature test this morning.  I prayed like crazy and did a pretty good job.

Curtis and I went to Chapel.  Doc Speer led it.  It was nice.  I came back to my phone and heard my phone ring.  It was Sharon calling from her car phone.  She and her three girls were on their way to Boone to see a movie and they wanted to know if myself and others wanted to come along.

I have rehearsal at 2:30 though and everyone else is busy.  The girls are out of school thanks to the winter storm, but Lees-McRae isn’t.  So, we couldn’t make it.

Sharon cares so much for us here.  I love her so much.

It’s funny how I prayed like crazy today just to get an A.  I should pray like crazy just because I’m alive.

I love you Lord.  Thanks for bring Vince, Allen, Charlie, and Kate back safely.

They said they had a great time.  They went to universal studios and Charlie bought me an E.T. poster.

Vince and I watched it last night.


I love the scene in which Elliot and E.T. are looking at each other.  They are both in need of a friend.  They are so longing and desperate to make a connection that the simple scratch of a nose means the world to them.  The touch of an ear; the wiggling of a finger.  They both instantly knew they were friends forever.

One day, I shall meet my wife, and both of us will see ourselves in each other’s eyes.

February 5, 1996 – Monday – 1:25 p.m.

Dan won both his ski races this past weekend.  We talked about it at dinner and then he and I plus Murrell left for Food Lion.  They got what they needed and I ran by the video store and rented Immortal Beloved.  We went back to the car, but it wouldn’t start.  We called Mike and he eventually came to pick us up.  But it took a while and we were freezing.  One the way back we saw the temperature at the bank and it was -6 degrees.

This morning it was -9 degrees.

Now I believed it has raised to a soaring 4 degrees.

I liked Immortal Beloved, especially the 9th symphony scene.  Brilliant!

Charlie, Kate, Vince, and Allen haven’t returned from Florida yet.  It even snowed in Pensacola, Florida from what I’ve heard.  I hope they get back safely.  I wonder if this means Emily saw snow?

I find so much peace and joy as I go to sleep each night knowing that Vince and Allen now know and love the Lord.  Hopefully He will use me to help many others do the same.