November 10, 1999 – Wednesday – 10:15 p.m.

The sun set across the Chesapeake Bay, on the other end of Portsmouth, beyond the ports of Norfolk, as Marie and I watched the red blood sky flicker along the water of the world below.  Sunsets, moonrises, barren deserts, and autumn woods.

There are other things going on besides Marie, but she is the only thing worth writing about.

I’m surviving the semester but I’m seeing that I need help to get me through this life.  I can’t survive on moviemaking alone.  I can’t even survive on human love alone.  I can only survive on the love of God, but I see how he is using both work and love to show me his goodness and his grace.

I want to share this with Marie.  I want us to be bond together with Jesus.  But your will God, not mine.

November 8, 1999 – Monday – 11:00 a.m.

Eddie from Lees-McRae is going to be in my movie. He’ll spend the first week of January with me.  So that’s exciting!

I saw Marie on Saturday night.  She is so beautiful!  We talked about relationships and knew we were something, but didn’t know what title to give it.  She said the only relationships God speaks of in his Word are friendships and marriage, so she was hesitant to label us as anything in between.  I don’t think she’s ever had a boyfriend before.

I told Kimberly and Sterling about her, as well as Lindy and Vince.  She is amazing to me.  I feel like a school boy, oh wait, I still am.

November 5, 1999 – Friday – 11:50 p.m.

Thank you Jesus.

Marie just left.  She came over to watch Smoke Signals with me.  We talked over Celtic Christmas music and candlelight for two hours.  She surpasses them all.  Can she have me God?  Can I give myself to her?

She came over Thursday as well.  She’s so beautiful.  Her face tonight, lit by a single candlelight, shadows dancing across her face.  The simple way she would speak.  The way her eyes would lift and look through me.  The questions she would ask and the stories she would tell.  The way she would talk about God.  I feels I’ve never known anything so right.

At times Regent and Virginia Beach have always felt a bit off for me.  I wasn’t sure if this was home or not.  But ever since Marie, I’ve never felt more at home in my life.

You are wonderful Lord.

 

November 3, 1999 – Wednesday – 11:54 a.m.

A new month, a new week, a new day.  The final night of October was fantastic!  After church I went out to eat with Josh, Robin, Jason, Angie, and Christ from church.  We watched The Matrix at Josh’s house.  I then picked up Marie and she came with me to the Hillbilly Harvest at church.  It was fun!  Then we went to the Cinema/TV prayer meeting which is now called “The Gig,” meaning “God is Good!”

Winnie asked me to be in her Christmas show titled “Clown of God.”  I said yes.  I play this funny little thug.  I sure hope I have the time to do it.

I went over to Marie’s last night to read some of her writing.  She is easily the best thing around here.  I’m so amazed by her.  I give her to you God.

October 30, 1999 – Saturday – 9:57 p.m.

A lovely day.  This has been an unbelievable week for me spiritually.  I am letting go more and more.

I saw Marie Thursday night at a social gathering and today we spent about five hours together talking, walking, driving, and eating lunch.  She is special and amazing and there is an unexplainable peace about our relationship.

The fall colors were beautiful today.  The leaves do change here, though not as brightly as Banner Elk.  We found a beautiful sight where red canoes reflected in a still pond.  We drew in the sand in a small valley between the sand dunes.  We pretended we were in a dray and distant desert.

Tonight I took Chris with me to Bethel Christian Fellowship out in Pungo where the youth band was playing.  It was a nice time of worship.

There is only a month and a half left.  God has much to finish school wise through me, but it always gets done.  He has grown so amazing to me this week.  I’m looking forward to next week.

It is difficult to find the words.

I just say thanks.

 

October 28, 1999 – Thursday – 2:10 p.m.

Something is happening.

How can God’s mercy be so grand?  How can he give me so much?  Another one of my scripts was chosen for the school to see a full draft of.  It is titled Silhouette.

I enjoy teaching the class at church on Wednesdays.  Sterling, Kimberly, Melissa, Lauren, and all the rest are such a blessing.

I showed Sterling and her family the film I made with them.  It turned out wonderfully.

But above all those good things, thank you Lord for Marie.  Please have your way with us God, but even the simple possibility has blessed me beyond belief.

I saw her today in the bookstore and she looked simply amazing.  We laughed and talked and both admitted that we didn’t sleep much the night after our rendezvous with the bright full moon.  I asked her to go for a walk with me at Northwest River Park on Saturday.  She said yes.

You are the giver of all good things my Lord.  I love you so!

October 26, 1999 – Tuesday – 10:08 p.m.

Marie.  That is the name of the beautiful woman I watched the moonrise with over the Currituck Sound this evening.  It was unbelievably majestic, the images of the moon reflecting on her face will forever be with me.

Thank you Jesus.

We went to the Cinema/TV prayer meeting together on Saturday night over at Chris and Jason’s.  Then, on Monday, she thanked me for praying for her.  And today we sat next to each other in class.  She was simply amazing.

Tonight I just wanted to be around her, so I went over to her apartment and asked her if she wanted to find a place in the world where neither of us had been and just sit and talk.  She agreed to come, and I took her to North Carolina because she hadn’t been in the Union’s most beautiful state since 1997.  We drove down to Currituck and found an isolated road near the edge of the sound.

There we noticed a funny orange light in the trees and suddenly realized it was the moon, a bright full moon, and it rose beautifully before us.  A perfect eternal instant.

She let me borrow some music, and I lended her some as well.  I asked her if I could come and find her if ever I wanted to be random again.

She said yes.