October 19, 1997 – Sunday – 11:50 p.m.

The 20th day of October will begin in a few minutes.  We are all back in Banner Elk.  It is much colder here.

We rode Wave Runners on Saturday.  It was cold and rainy, but that made it all the more fun.  We went out to eat at Crabby Nick’s, I think it was called, that night.  I sat next to Abigail and Ann-Marie.  We had a coloring contest and Abigail won.

Charlie spoke on humility that night.  Something I need more of in my life.

We went to a neat church this morning and again I sat by Abigail.  It was so wonderful praising the Lord next to her.  We played miniature golf, met some cool Christians who owned the place and headed home.

And now, I’m scared.  God revealed a lot of things to me this weekend.  A lot of things about me.  I cried so hard on Friday night.  So much pain, sorrow, guilt, and love flowed out of me in my tears.  All of the people from this weekend mean so much to me.  The house we stayed at was perfect.

I couldn’t believe my time there was ending when I woke up this morning.  I went to the beach alone and stood in awe of how comfortable I felt.  The sun was breaking through the clouds.  Birds were flying all around.  And dolphins were riding the waves.  It was so perfect and God loved me so much.  Tears filled my eyes ’cause I knew I was leaving.

Pain and excitement filled my soul, and God used this cloudy weekend to give me a small taste of the larger storm to come.

I know I talk about this storm often, but this will easily be one of the hardest things I’ll ever do.

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