September 4, 1994 – Sunday – 11:50 p.m.

Tonight after I ushered I Do, I Do, James and I, plus a bunch of people I don’t really know, went to Subway and just fooled around.   The other people’s names were Kurt, Lulu, Katie, and some other girl.  I guess I had fun.  

But what I did tonight I used to do with other people.  And they are not here with me.

At one time, I wanted so desperately to get away; off on my own.

But now I see that what I really wanted was to get away and bring them with me.