July 16, 1997 – Wednesday – 10:45 a.m.

Monday night was amazing.  Rebecca St. James puts on a wonderful concert!  There was an altar call during the concert and I went up.  I needed for God to break me and recreate me.  It’s time for me to grow to the next level.

Last night I was asked to drive some Alumni up to the top of Beech Mountain.  We met a tour guide up there and toured around the old Land of Oz.  There was a museum there with actual costumes and props from the movie.  We got to walk through the life size replica of Dorothy’s house, and we followed the yellow brick road.  Everything was just beautiful and amazing!  Realizing I was in a magical land in a small town that sits higher than any other town in the Eastern United States, I left the group and walked ahead on my own.

After I turned a corner I stopped and looked around since I was totally alone.  And there I saw what I thought was a statue of a deer.  Only the statue turned and looked at me, so I quickly realized it was a real deer.  I expected her to immediately run away, but instead she just bent down to eat some grass.

I took a step closer, still expecting her to run, but she didn’t.  She lifted up her head from the grass and looked me in the eyes.  I took a few more steps closer and then the deer walked closer to me.  She was so beautiful.

After a few more steps we were right in front of each other.  I knelt down and she took a step closer and sniffed my cheek and my mouth.

No fear.

Nothing.

She saw me for who I was and touched her nose to my face, then softly licked my cheek.

It was a taste of heaven.

No fear or hate.

Only love.

Love.

On this Wednesday morning a thunder storm is brewing over Banner Elk.  I can hear the thunder rolling now.  The skies are darkening.

The wind has caught up with this flower and broken it.

I am dying, only to be raised.

The wind will soon blow my petals to another land and there I will grow again.

But one thing is clear, God wanted me here in this land and in this time.  He brought me to these mountains to kiss me.  May your name forever be praised!

June 5, 1997 – Thursday – 11:50 p.m.

Let’s see, what has happened these past couple of days?  The box office has opened; business is slow.  Lindy, my assistant, and I have wonderful conversations while we work.  She is simply great.  Last night Jeni and Tracey and I spent the night at a house down in Foscoe (they were house sitting).  I fell down the stairs; it really scared me.  I went swimming with Allen, Vince, and Laura on Wednesday.  Been chatting with MovieMark on the Rebecca St. James chatline, and he isn’t doing too well.  I got Jerry Maquire in the mail and I’ve watched it a couple of times already.  And, well, we leave for Promise Keepers in the morning.

Life has never felt so fast.

Will this ever slow down?

April 3, 1997 – Thursday – 4:15 p.m.

A wonderful day.

Last night I went with Curtis and his girlfriend Ryan to Boone and Blowing Rock.  We drove around and ate out.  It was a beautiful evening.  The stars were amazing.

I ate breakfast with Jessica this morning, did some homework, went to class, exercised, and chatted on the Rebecca St. James chatline.

On the chatline, I talked with a lot about praying int he spirit.  One girl named Rejoice basically praised me for my relationship with God.  She was Australian and she was so encouraging.  It felt like I was talking to Rebecca St. James herself.  That chatline has blessed me so much.  Thank you God.

Things are going really well.  The Lord is making me holy.  I hunger for his righteousness.

You are holy Lord.

Oh so holy.

Your word stands forever.

It’s changing me forever.

January 8, 1997 – Wednesday – 9:40 a.m.

Everybody got back safely.  It was so good to see Jessica, Abigail, Ann-Marie, Shawna, and everybody.  I spent over $300 on my books.  Eek.

Yesterday evening I began to play Rebecca St. James and went to the Lord in prayer.  Then suddenly God told me to call up all my friends and invite them over for a Bible Study.  So I did.  I called up everyone I knew but only Vince, Allen, Dan, Josh, Timothy, Abigail, Jessica, Jeni, Tracey, and Todd came over.  I spoke on Romans 5:1,2 and the Spirit of God showed up.  It was so awesome.  That night will be one of the greatest nights of the semester.  Everyone left enlightened.

At dinner earlier in the evening, Jeni asked Abigail how K.C. was and Abigail said, “To be honest, I really don’t know.”  Jeni’s eyes widened.  Abigail said, “I’m a little confused.”

Oh God, please be with her, whatever the problem is, please be their hearts.

Classes start today.  I already went to Scene Design.  I have to spend a lot of money on supplies, but it should be fun.

It’s so good to be here.  The year and the semester are starting off beautifully.  I give you all the glory God.  It feels like my feet aren’t even touching the ground.

August 17, 1996 – Saturday – 1:10 a.m.

My birthday.

I got my hair cut this morning.  Then went to some RA training workshops.  I put the name tags up on my hall.  There was a picnic for the RAs that evening.  And then that night Debbie and I went to see Courage Under Fire.  Actually, I guess it’s still tonight.  We’ve been talking a lot.  She seems cool.  She likes movies a lot, so we get along great.

We went to Wildcat Lake and talked for close to an hour on the swings.

We just got back.

And I am now twenty.

I never thought I would actually make it this far, but here I am.

I looked ahead in Rebecca St. James devotional book today and found a letter she had written to her future husband.  She told him, not knowing really who he is, that she loves him already and is saving herself for him.

This blessed my soul, for I too am a virgin.  Sure, there were moments where Jeni and I went a little too far, so I can’t say I’m completely innocent, but Jesus was there, protecting us from going any further.  I learned from those moments and I am moving on.

A new decade of my life begins.

I asked for someone who would simply like to watch a movie with me.  Debbie is here and I am thankful.

But to my future wife I write:  “I will stay faithful to you, even before we meet.  I love you already.”

August 7, 1996 – Wednesday – 12:40 p.m.

Yesterday was my dad’s birthday.  He turned 46.  I sent him a card.

And also yesterday, I wrote a letter to Rebecca St. James and mailed it.  I might sound crazy, but she is a child of God, just like me, and I wanted to say thank you for her music and her writings.

I was in rehearsal until 1:30 this morning.  Crazy for You opens tomorrow.  My summer ends in six days.

It hasn’t felt like summer, but it is nevertheless.

Fishnet didn’t happen for me.

Deep Creek might not either.

I didn’t go to the movies as often, and Jonathan wasn’t around at all.  I wonder if Omneya is still at McDonald’s and if she misses me.

Oh well.  Six days left.  Most of my summer was spent in Hayes Auditorium.

Ten days until I’m 20.

Vince, Curtis, and I are making plans to stay at Vince’s house on Long Island during Thanksgiving Break to visit New York.

Then Christmas.

And soon…1997.