August 24, 1996 – Saturday – 11:30 p.m.

Auditions were this morning.  I’m not sure if I want to be a part of this show or not, but I was called back for auditions tomorrow.

After lunch I cam back to my room and tried to call Laura, but no one answered.  So, I took a long nap and then did some homework.  I didn’t call her until later in the evening, she was there, and we talked for about an hour.  We talked about everything.  About guys, girls, high school, college, and a lot about God.

We understood each other.

Someone understood me.  She is the greatest.  I thank you for her Lord.  She wants me to call her again soon; simply to talk.

Be with us Lord.

Time continues to move on.  Last year Syndi and James and I were at Dairy Queen.  My hair was long and my mind full of waterfalls.

But a new August 24th is nearly over.  Tomorrow is church and Rachel Anne, as well as Cindy and her new roommate Shelia, say they are coming to church.

A guy on my hall named Josh is coming as well.  He is 18, but he looks 10 thanks to some weird physical disease.  He is fun though.

And Laura will be there.

Father, may I dream of her tonight.  May I dream of her innocence and her purity, of her virtue and her likeness of you.

Oh Holy God, how majestic is your name in all the earth!!

August 31, 1995 – Thursday – 11:45 a.m.

It is the last day of August.

I am supposed to meet Syndi in 15 minutes for lunch.  Last night she and I had a craving for cookies, so at 10:30 p.m. we drove to Newland, but the grocery store was closed so we went all the way to Boone and got back around midnight.  It was just the two of us, roaming the High Country with no purpose at all.  James thinks we are together and that is why he’s had some problems.  He’s never had a girlfriend and he is almost 20-years-old.  He’s seems really depressed.

Syndi said something like, “Let’s do such and such together since we are supposed to be dating…at least according to James.

She asked me earlier if I would meet her for lunch and dinner.

Oh well, I’m in college!  Let’s just have a little fun with this situation.  I have no idea where this is going, but I’m sure the two of us will have the greatest time this weekend.

August 29, 1995 – Tuesday – 11:15 p.m.

Another day!

I’ve been having some trouble with James.  Syndi and I both have.  But it is all over with now, so I’m not going to bore myself with the details.  In short, he is acting very selfish and immature about Syndi and myself, plus a few other things.

We have no classes this Monday, thanks to Labor Day.  Syndi mentioned wanting to go to the zoo.  Since we have a long weekend she and I plan to go to my house this weekend and then go to the zoo on Saturday.  My parents are going to be away, visiting Deep Creek with my grandparents, so it looks like it’ll just be Syndi and myself.  And truthfully, I hope so.

Tonight I had a rehearsal for Antigone.  Originally, I was the Sentry, but tonight Dr. D. also gave me the role of the Messenger.  So, my role in Antigone has doubled!  That pleased me!  And today I called Regent University in Virginia Beach.  They are going to send me some information.  I talked to a woman named Elinor.  So many doors have opened.

God is simply great!  I’m only a sophomore, yet I feel like I know where the Lord is leading me after graduation.

Thank you for everything Father!

August 27, 1995 – Sunday – 10:15 p.m.

A year since the storm.

However, it did rain today.

And Syndi and I found another waterfall.  Except we stood on top of this one.

We spent the whole day together.  I asked her last night if she would like to come to church with me.  She did and she said she enjoyed it.  She sang the songs and she read the Bible with me.  She was smiling.  We were both hungry, so after the service we went to the Banner Elk Cafe and I bought us breakfast.  Penny was our waitress.  She is the sweetest girl.

Then we drove to Wildcat Lake and walked out across the dam there.  We were on top of a waterfall.  We spent about an hour or so there.  She took ahold of my hand as we walked.  She held it so tight with our fingers intertwined.  We picked lily pad flowers and gave them to each other.

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We went back to campus and ate lunch.  Other guys wanted us to sit with them, but she wanted us to sit alone at a separate table.  After lunch, we went to her room.  She played with my hair and I did some homework.  We laughed, smiled, and talked about so many things.  I spent the entire afternoon in her room.

James and Curt came over.  She laid next to me and put her head on my chest.  I laid my hand on her waist.  I asked her if she wanted to go to church with me again tonight.  She said yes.  She had a better time than this morning.  She wanted to help me find the scriptures in the Bible.  She smiled the whole time.

After church, we worked out in the gym then went to her room.  I spent some time there and then came back here.

James is bummed.  He is jealous.  He is left out.  He sounds really depressed.  He had a huge crush on Syndi all last year.  He’s always adored Julia Roberts and Syndi is the spitting image of Julia Roberts.  A beautiful, tall, curvy body with a huge, bright smile.

I try to help James, but he won’t let me.

. . .

Syndi just called me a few minutes ago while I was writing.  She just wanted to talk some more.  She is wonderful.  She hugged me when I left tonight.  She held my hand when we prayed in church.

She is special.

I claim her for the Kingdom of God!  You cannot have her Satan!  I claim this in Jesus’ name!!

Thank you Father.  Before she grows close to me, I pray she grows close to you.

August 26, 1995 – Saturday – 11:35 p.m.

An amazing day!

Auditions went okay.  I had fun with it.  I took a break for lunch and found Syndi in the cafeteria.  We sat together and had a nice talk.  This evening after dinner, we (Syndi, James, a new guy named Todd, and myself) spent time in my room.  I had the Performing Arts department’s video camera, so I recorded us just talking and hanging out.  Charlie called and asked me if I wanted to go over to Nebel Hall and play spoons with him, Kate, and Stofka.  It seems that this morning, Kate realized that she had a good thing when she had Charlie, so some things have changed and they are together again.

Syndi, James, Todd, and I went to play spoons.  It was the greatest!  But afterwards, we came back here.  Syndi and I were lying on the bed while James and Todd were watching TV.  I then turned and looked at this beautiful girl lying across from me.  She looked at me.  And for what seemed like 30 minutes, we didn’t look away.  We smiled and laughed, but we kept looking at each other, not saying a word.  She eventually took a hold of my hand and rubbed it and told me how soft my skin was.

But James began to act weird, so he left and Syndi decided she should go back to her room.

I asked Syndi if she wanted to go to church with me tomorrow.  She said yes.

Something is happening.

But I’m not saying anything.  I’m actually holding back.  It takes so much strength for me to keep my arms by my side.  It seems like they belong around her.

I believe I’m going to go for a walk.

Simply to pray for this girl.

That God will let his heavenly water fall upon her.

August 25, 1995 – Friday – 10:15 a.m.

Last night was interesting.

Convocation was last night.  Syndi and James and I went together.  She wore the most beautiful dress.  But it was very low cut and her beautiful body was exposed.  And for some reason, I wished she was more covered up.  We sat next to each other and wrote notes to back and forth, etc.  I got some looks from people saying, “Are you two together?”

We went to Diary Queen after the convocation and had ice cream.  We all came back to my room and took some pictures.  Then after our hall meetings we went to Wildcat Lake and played on the swings and then drove around to just take in the beautiful mountains and do our best to get lost.

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I pray for Syndi.

I pray she finds the Lord.

But I need to be careful.  I cannot fall for this girl.  She is beyond my reach.  Yet, I have held her.  I have touched her.  I have walked with her.  She pours her dreams and problems out to me.

I guess I was right.

Another girl came along.

May 9, 1995 – Tuesday – 11:56 p.m.

It’s almost Wednesday, May 10th.  My room is looking empty.

Yesterday, James asked me where I was Sunday night.  Now James has liked Syndi for a long time and I wasn’t sure how he would take the truth, but I told him anyway.  He didn’t get mad, he just wished he was in my shoes.

Synod came into the post office yesterday.  We talked for several minutes before she left.  I called her that evening before she drove back home to Florida.  She said she was about to call me.  She gave me her address.

I’m sure our paths will cross again.

I talked to both mom and Jonathan tonight.  Jonathan got a job at Subway in Sanford.  He also asked me if I wanted to go to Myrtle Beach with him this weekend.  He is going with his girlfriend Mandy.  I said yes.

I’m looking forward to it.

One more day.

I will leave my world.

One day more.

My summer will begin.

One more day.

This is my world.

One day more.

Must I do this again.

April 28, 1995 – Friday – 8:30 a.m.

Forrest Gump comes out on video today.

At 10 o’clock this morning I will do my scene with Penny, Christina, and James.  I’ve enjoyed working on this.  It’s been a lot of fun.

Last night, James and Syndi and I went swimming in Boone.  It was an indoor pool.  We had a great time.

As I was sleeping last night, I got a call from Charlie.  He said someone in Tate Dorm had just tried to commit suicide and he asked for me to pray.

Tomorrow is Carowinds.

Then Sunday will be April 30, 1995.  It’s been one year since that amazing day.

I’ve got to go to class.

Later.

April 22, 1995 – Saturday – 6:30 p.m.

I am so freaking stupid!

During the matinee performance of the Dance Concert, Michelle came up to the sound booth and asked me what I was doing tonight?

“I have to strike the set and then I am going out with James and some of his friends.”

“Oh, okay.  Never mind.”

“Why?”

“Well,” she said, “I was going to see if you wanted to go to the Spring Formal with me and some other friends.”

And for some dumb reason, the next words that poured out of my mouth were, “Well, I hadn’t planned on going.  Do you want me to go?”

She said, “Well, you have plans, so it’s okay.”

I said, “Alright.”  And she walked down the aisle to her seat.

And I just sat there, not quite sure of what had just happened.  Then I immediately realized what had happened.  And then I realized I said no.

I said no to Michelle!

Why?!

I don’t know.  I like her a lot, but I don’t like to go to Formal/Prom things.  So that’s what was so weird about the request.  But hopefully I will have another chance where we can do something else together as friends.

September 3, 1994 – Saturday – 10:35 a.m.

I can’t believe it’s already September.  A week ago, I spent my last day back home.

I got a part in Once Upon A Mattress.  I’m the 2nd Knight.  I sing and dance and have three lines.  I sing in about four or five songs.  It’s a small part for sure, but it suits me greatly.

Thank you Lord.

Charlie has left for the weekend.  James is still here though.

Thursday night we had a Bible study.  Charlie leads it.  Besides me, there are four other girls in it:  Christy, Glenda, Soco, and a freshman girl named Olivia.  Olivia is a dance major.  When she sees me on campus, she always says hi.  She is really beautiful and is going to go to Heaton Christian Church, the same church I’m going to.

Christy is supposed to pick me up tomorrow since Charlie is out of town.  I feel like I’m the only student here without my own car.

My Friday nights and Saturday nights are free, so I’m going to try and get a job somewhere.

My homework assignment for Acting I is to do a random good deed.  That’ll be fun.

It’s September now.

Once Upon A Mattress opens in October.

The Bible study group is going to try and see Steven Curtis Chapman in concert soon.

I have a new family here.

And in four years, I’m pretty sure it will hurt to leave.