December 4, 1994 – Sunday – 2:30 p.m.

Church was okay this morning, but the weird thing is that my roommate hasn’t been here in about two weeks.  I don’t know where he is.

It’s already December.  Christmas is in 21 days.  Wow!!

Everything is great.

Truthfully, I have no idea what to write about in my journal today.  Jeni is in Ballet class right now.  I love her so much.  She is my best friend.  I want to be with her forever.  I want to hold her and comfort her.  In everything I do is seems part of me is thinking about her.

She was emotional last night.  Jeni wants to be my wife.  She lets me know that.  Yet sometimes she thinks too much and last night she said she thought I wanted to be a filmmaker more than I wanted to be her husband.  I told her I wanted both, but if I had to choose I would choose her.

I wish I could try to describe to you how I feel about her.  When I look into her blue-gray eyes I see myself, but I also see Jesus. They are so deep, so bright.  God knew what he was doing when he created her and he also know how much she would mean to me when he created her.  We are so close.  We hold each other for so long and just look into each other’s eyes.  I love kissing her.  I don’t ever want to kiss another girl.

When all my days are over, I want to say the only girl I ever kissed was my Jeni.

She says that she hopes I can say the same thing.  She never wants to kiss another guy.

We have a perfect relationship.

Thank you Lord.

September 28, 1994 – Wednesday – 11:55 p.m.

I just got back from going on a walk with Jeni.  We prayed together about some things and we talked about stuff as we kissed each other after every other word.  She told me tonight that she loves looking into my eyes because it shows her how much I love Christ.

Someone in the cast is letting me borrow his extra pair of ballet shoes, and someone told me of the little makeup that I need and how little it costs  I can actually afford it.

Thank you Lord for providing for my needs.  Thank you for sending me Jeni.  She is so great Lord and she loves you more than anything.

I adore you Lord.  I lift your name on high.  I praise you.  I magnify you.  You are wonderful Jesus.  Thank you Holy Spirit.

El Shaddai!

Yahweh!

I love you!!!

September 28, 1994 – Wednesday – 11:45 a.m.

Jeni and I went for a walk yesterday at 1:45 p.m.  We talked and held hands.  We kissed a few times.  She smells so great.

She has gone out of town for the day for a dance performance.  I saw her briefly this morning.  She will be back in time for dinner and rehearsal.  I still miss her though.

Mattress opens in a week.

This morning in Acting class I did my scene of “Expresso Bar” with Mary.  Not to brag, but we were the only one’s who did it off book and we did it the best.

Mr. Taylor said he could see the subtext in our faces.

Costuming is tonight at six o’clock for Mattress.

Not much else to tell.  I’m believing God for some money for ballet shoes and a makeup kit.  I need about $55.

Thank you Jesus.

You are my provider.