July 9, 1994 – Saturday – 11:52 p.m.

This is my last journal entry for Fishnet.

Today I bumped into a little boy, he had lost his mom.  I helped them find each other and when they did they held onto each other and cried deeply.

As I walked back from their reunion, happy as I could be, I was in the midst of the crowd, and the band on the stage started playing, everyone in the crowd stood up and started clapping.  I know it sounds weird, but it felt like they were clapping for me.  I felt something stir in me and God said, “This is you.”

Later in the afternoon, a huge storm came up.  The tarp fell down and everyone was under it holding it down to keep it from flying away.  I, myself, videotaped the whole ordeal with Lisa’s video camera.

But what we didn’t know while we were under that tarp was that a huge funnel cloud formed above the hillside and almost touched ground.  But before it did, it seemed like something just picked it up and sent it on its way.

Later in the evening, the sky was filled with a double rainbow.  It was beautiful.  God has shown me who I am and he has made a promise to me.

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July 9, 1994 – Saturday – 6:30 a.m.

Yesterday I went to The Fish Bowl again, and the same thing happened to me, except stronger.  God touched me.  Jesus touched me.  I reached out to him and he reached in.  I’ve never been so close to God than…right now.  But through all of the joy and excitement, meeting new people, getting to know them, remembering who I am in Christ; in the midst of all that, only one thing seems wrong, one thing that is not right: Jenna and Tenielle aren’t here to experience it with me.

Today is our last day here.  The time has flown by.  I could live like this forever, but Jenna and Tenielle would have to be up here with me.

Yesterday, I did some crazy stuff with Kristin, Dana, and Hannah.  I’ve known Dana a while now.  She will be a Junior at Appalachian State University in Boone while I’m a Freshman at Lees-McRae in Banner Elk, only 17 miles away.  Kristen and I get along okay and Hannah and I are good friends.  Both of them want to come to my church since I told them how awesome our Praise and Worship was.

Steve Camp performed last night.  That was great!  He’s Kenny’s favorite singer.

James Robinson preached and boy was he good.  He said something about Hollywood and how we should pray for them, but he didn’t condemn all the good movies that had been made.  He even said a new movie called Forrest Gump was a movie that all Christians should see.  Hopefully I’ll see it soon.  I walked up to him afterwards and told him thank you for such a good word.

I’ve taken some pictures up here.  I can’t wait to get them developed.

Deep Creek is right around the corner.  I wonder if I’ll have as much fun as I’m having here at Fishnet?

February 14, 1994 – Valentine’s Day – 10:19 p.m.

I’m at the boys house in Bonlee, you know, the ones I babysit.

The Olympics are on.

Since Sanford is not long distance here, I called Ryan.  We had a wonderful conversation.  She told me about stuff she had written and how school was going.  We talked about how things have changed.  She is still wonderful, but I fear the feelings I did have for her are fading.

She did tell me one thing that caught my attention.  She said that Christi told her that she liked the way I wear my hair now.

Christi mentioned me.

After I talked to Ryan I called Jenna.  She was sleeping.  She and Tenielle have been sick.  Puking sick.  I’ll pray for them.  Tenielle was up and we talked a bit.  Jenna got the letter I wrote her today.  It was a Valentine’s Day note with a poem and a drawing.  Tenielle said she really liked it.

What am I doing?

Do I even know?

Christi?

Jenna?

Somebody please tell me!!

Jenna already knows that I like her.  She likes me.

Christi is a wonderful friend who is now a girl who has practically been handed to me for a wonderful relationship.  I don’t know what I’m going to do.

I’ll just have to wait and see.