September 11, 1999 – Saturday – 6:30 p.m.

The weather has been unbelievable recently.  I finished the shoot for the CBN feature on Thursday.  The piece was about a daughter whose boyfriend killed her mother and father.  It caused me to reflect.  I’ve come to notice the amount of pain and suffering my life has not seen.  No one truly close to me has died.

As autumn comes closer, I’m reminded of change.  This all seems to happen too fast.  I hate that I get too selfish.  I hate that it took me too long to love this place, and now it feels I’m about to leave it.  I wish I was more full of love.  I wish I wasn’t so picky when it comes to girls.  Is it bed to be satisfied with your love God?  I’m content with what you have given me.

So where do we go from here?  You died so that I might live.  Is that what I should do?  Live?  Love others?  Love you?  Love you by loving others?  Love others by loving you?

I can do that.  I can enjoy those within my proximity.  I can enjoy all the beauty.  I can see you in all of them.


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