March 25, 1998 – Wednesday – 3:00 p.m.

Things aren’t going very well.  Sarah came back Sunday and it was good to see her.  The Oscars came on Monday and I watched half with Sarah, but then I had to leave due to visitation hours.  She didn’t want to come and watch the rest with me in my room where visitation is longer.  That kinda hurt.  Especially when last night I found out she was in Mason’s room across the hall watching TV.  I heard her in the hallway and she didn’t stop by.

I went for a 6 1/2 mile walk last night and talked with the Lord.  He showed me a shooting star.  It was nice.

I got pretty sick today and I called Sarah on the phone and told her, but she didn’t offer to come see me.  She didn’t even ask more about how I was feeling, it seemed like my illness bothered her.  I had to ask her to come over and it took her 40 minutes and she only stayed five.  And in those short few minutes a tear rolled down her cheek.  I’m not sure what that was about, but it felt like it was for her and not for me.

I’ve decided not to go to my afternoon classes.  I’m going to stay in and rest.

Be with me Lord.

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