April 9, 1997 – Wednesday – 11:30 p.m.

Yesterday was a wonderful day.  I was on a wonderful Jesus high.  Then at dinner, I sat with Jeni and Abigail.  A lot of time went by with just me talking and Jeni saying a few things.  Then I asked Abigail why she was so quiet.

She stared at me intently for a few silent seconds, and then she said, “Do you really care, Jacob?”

“Yes,” I said in a very simple tone.

And with such a mean and devilish look, she asked, “Why?”

She stared at me.  I stared at her.  Then she went to get dessert and I stood up and walked slowly back to my room.  My wonderful day came to a screeching halt thanks to Abigail’s six words.

So, I gave her a call and said, “What was that?”  A long conversation followed and we spilled our hearts and thoughts.  She is one confused and confusing girl.  I am so thankful that I learned this about her.  I like her way less now and can’t believe I ever dreamed so endlessly about her.

She thought all my “God talk” and Bible studies were just to get close to her and get on her good side.  She sees so much with worldly eyes.  I thought she was more mature in her faith.  It hurt that she would assume I’d play such petty games.  So, we’ll see how this will close before she leaves near the end of the month.

Everything else is slightly short of perfect.

I love you Lord!

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