March 30, 1997 – Sunday – 10:25 p.m.

It’s been a slow day.  Church at Hickory Free Will Baptist, lunch with Tracey and her 20 other family members, a long nap, and an even longer walk.

My walk was nice.  I went into the open plains behind Tracey’s house.  It was very flat, but very beautiful.  Geese were all around.  The sun was setting and I was perfectly happy in my solitude.  I thought a lot while I was walking.  Jeni tries to control me.  She tells me what to do, what to wear, how to act.  She tries to be my mother.  I can’t stand it.  She really annoyed me today.  She kept coming up to me and putting her arms around me.  I wish she would leave me alone.  She’s been making me feel really uncomfortable.  I feel bad for kissing her the other night.

This evening, I just rested because my stomach was bothering me.  I listened to music in Tracey’s room.  I listened to Michael W. Smith’s “Emily.”  While listening to it, I pulled Emily’s picture out of my wallet and looked at it.  Jeni barged into the room and saw me looking at Emily’s picture.  She got a weird look on her face and left.

Jeni is wonderful, but not for me and I find comfort in her graduating.

Please send her on her way Lord, and take care of her.

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