December 23, 1994 – Friday – 10:00 a.m.

My visit home has been good.  I arrived here Wednesday around 5:30 p.m.  Kevin and Nate and I just joked about everything and then we went to church.  The first person I saw there was Jonathan.  He hugged me.  Then he introduced me to Mandy and I went inside.  I saw Cheryl and hugged her.  Then Anne and I hugged her.  She showed me the ring that Sam gave her.

Jenna, Tenielle, Sunny, and Shar came in later and they all hugged me.

Church, however, was different.

Some of my favorite faces were gone, and new ones were there.

Shurby is not the youth pastor anymore, but he still goes to church there.  He one time shared a vision with the whole church about how the youth group would have 700 members and change the entire city.  What happened?

After I said goodbye to everyone we went to Christi’s house.  Only Jason, Christi, and Patti were there.  It was so good to see Jason.  We talked about school and theatre.  Christi came in and I hugged her.  She is still beautiful.  We all couldn’t stop talking.

And after I left that place that night I thought of everything from the past.

Everything.

And I can honestly say, that between all the girls, Christi was my favorite.

Jonathan spent the night and our family supposedly had its Christmas.  I got new clothes.

I called Jeni.  She had had a bad day.  She missed me.

On Thursday I went to work at McDonald’s from noon to 8:00 p.m.  Peter picked me up afterwards and we came here to play Risk.  After 12 years we are still the greatest of friends.

Last night Jonathan and I had our talk.  I told him how I met Jeni and how our relationship began.  He cried.  He said he was jealous.  Jonathan still loves Kate; she was his first love.  But they had sex and that ruins any relationship when it’s not in marriage.  Then Jonathan and Vicky had sex.  Jonathan said he had sex with two girls at college.

Why?

Four different girls and he isn’t even married.

Why is he with Mandy when he knows that he still loves Kate?

He has messed up the story of love and he knows it.  That’s why he was jealous of me.  What I have he can never have again.  He threw it all away.  His chances are gone.  He can’t start over.

I do have a good thing going with Jeni.  And I’m not going to mess it up.  I’m going to let it grow.

I love you Jeni.

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