November 5, 1994 – Saturday – 7:15 a.m.

Yesterday Jeni and I went to the top of Beech Mountain.  She loved it.  We were on top of the world together.  I also returned the yellow brick to it’s rightful spot.

But that night, something happened.  We were on her bed, holding each other and kissing, and then she got on top of me and kissed me more and well, something completely natural happened.  I, already being erect in my pants, uh…let loose a load, if you know what I mean.

I was embarrassed more than anything.  It took me a while, but I told Jeni and she felt bad.  I told her I was sorry, but that it was no big deal and that stuff like that happens to a guy, even when he is asleep.  It’s completely natural.

I went back to my room and took a shower and changed clothes.  I came back to her room and she was crying.  Remember when I told you that Jeni and her ex-boyfriend went a little too far one night?  Well, what just happened between us reminded her of that.  And what is all boiled down to was that she was scared because she says that even though she is not sure we will be together forever, she very much would like for us to be.  She doesn’t want her heart to break again.  She was afraid to love me anymore than she already did.  I told her that if we don’t last forever that the only thing we’ll remember is love.  So, let it be love, let us grow.

We prayed for God’s will to happen in our lives and to keep us pure.  We were okay, so we went to another girl’s room and watched Swing Kids.  It was a little slow, but great!

Afterward, we went to her room and I fell in love with her more and more.  I couldn’t stop looking at her and even now, I can’t stop thinking about her.

She is the greatest girl I have ever known.

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