July 3, 1994 – Sunday – 10:30 p.m.

Can you believe it?  Today was actually a great day!

After church we went to Jenna and Tenielle’s to swim.  Rebecca was over there too.  And even though Kevin and Marcus were around everyone seemed to enjoy themselves.

Today, while I was changing in the bathroom I saw a diary of Jenna’s.  There were only two entries written in it, June 3rd and June 4th.  I’m sorry to say, but I read them both.  I was mentioned in both and in the second entry she said that Marcus gave her a yellow rose, but she didn’t accept it.

I’ve been around Jenna and Tenielle for five days in a row.  I’ve been over at their house for four days in a row.  If things go how I want them to, then I’ll see them tomorrow as well.  And as you know, tomorrow is the 4th of July.

Something is up with Scott.  Before youth group started last night, he said he was going to get his Bible, since he had some time.  But he never came back and he wasn’t at church today either.  Earlier that day, he called me at Jenna and Tenielle’s.  He said he was trying to get a hold of me all day.  Then, when we before youth group started he sat alone while Tenielle was off talking to Kevin and Marcus was talking to Jenna.

Scott has no one special in his life.  Cheryl is the only girlfriend he’s had in the past two years and she is now dating the very handsome Joel, who is super muscular and Scott is totally overweight.  It has to hurt.  He doesn’t even have friends to talk to like I have in Jenna and Tenielle.  He thinks that Kevin and Tenielle and Jenna and Marcus are couples.

But they are only friends, just like I’m their friend.

Anyway, he never came back and I’m worried about him.

I have about 55 days until my departure.  And each day as I get closer and closer to the 28th of August, I get closer and closer to the people around me.

Deep Creek is almost here and soon I will stand over the creek that runs next to the Pizza Hut in Bryson City, NC.  There I will think of how the past year has gone since I last stood on that ledge.

My Senior year.

Remember when I shed a lightning tear?

It was over Ryan.

Now I hardly know who she is.

Then I wrecked my stepfather’s car.

Objects in the rearview mirror may appear closer than they are.

Inseparable friends I thought we were.

Now I’m not so sure.

Then Jonathan and I took a College Day

To a place so far away.

Then the sun went down and by the moon two birds did fly

Now, as they circle me, I don’t want to say goodbye.

I seem close to all of this; not far.

But objects in the rearview mirror may appear closer than they are.

I have a gift of 55 days.  I wish I could take the flowers with me, but they must grow in the Son’s rays.

Some things just cannot be.

My winter dream did change.

And they will probably change again.

I’ll soon have a new room to rearrange.

All around will be be beautiful women.

But now I will continue to drive my car,

Until I cross the bar.

From time to time I will look back far, 

And objects in the rearview mirror will appear closer than they are.

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